Exactly. I'm writing simply for the sake of writing - because I just need to write.
Last night I attended a gathering of various social connections over dinner at which we were all asked to share our hobbies. On my list of hobbies was, of course, writing. I love to write. I write music whenever I have that unique moment of inspiration and motivation to put words to a melody and a melody to a chord progression. I am girly in the sense that I journal about once a week. I am nerdy in the sense that I have a blog and I love blogging. However, I haven't written in my blog in a couple of months. I have trouble remembering to visit my blog to see if any of my blogging friends have written anything new. Every 2-3 weeks or so that I check this, however, I am saddened to find that only 1 or 2 people on my list have actually blogged. I miss my "blogging community".
When I was sharing said hobby last night, I couldn't help but think how pathetic it was that I haven't written anything in so long for claiming that I love writing as much as I say I do. I am quick to blame this on working 40 hours a week and having something on my calendar every Monday through Thursday. To me, routine is a lot like the movie Avatar; it fails to live up to the hype. Everyone claims that routine is so positive and healthy; in my life, while necessary in some way, I consider it to be more of a silent killer. For someone who used to be so passionate about things, I've allowed my life to become so predictable and thus my passions to become dwindled...and arguably non-existent.
At the same time, it's amazing how quickly life can change. In some ways, 6 months ago I would not have predicted my life right now looking the way it does. In other ways, I can feel the excitement of & desperation for impending change rise up within me. Though I have nothing tangible to base this on (only the voice of God) I am certain that my life will somehow look significantly different a year from today.
I recently wrapped up several months of studying the book of Acts. As geographical & historical as this book is, I feel I can sum it up in a few sentences: Because a few ordinary men were willing & obedient, God chose to do very extraordinary things through them even above & beyond starting the New Testament church. I know He wants to do extraordinary things through me, too, so what's stopping me from being willing & obedient? This is the challenge for the next year: surrender - because I need my life to look radically different within the next year. If it doesn't, perhaps it was a waste for my life to be spared from that flood over 2.5 years ago.
I wish I had a clever way of wrapping up this blog entry. Seeing as I don't, I think I picked a good title for this particular entry.